Where To Keep All Things Important

One child ago, I learned the hard way that if you can't feel your cell phone, it's most likely in the toilet.

Since the days of ole, when Conner went through roughly 5 cell phones in 18 months, I've adopted several techniques for keeping cell phones dry and toilet-free.

However, none have really caught on. I started keeping it in ONE place, but that defeats the purpose of a cell phone's mobility. Not to mention the fact that I missed SOOO many phone calls.

Then, I realized I could keep it on my person. And so, I started putting it in my pocket... only I realized very quickly that 90% of my sweat pants don't have pockets and I'll be darned if I sacrifice one of The Perks of The Mom Job by wearing JEANS all day. Plus, I did have about 16 months sandwiched in their in which I was either With Child, or With Weight From Said Child. So jeans weren't options and sweat pants were practically required.

(plus, we've all experienced "Cell Phone Was in Back Pocket of Jeans, Now In Toilet", right? right.)

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For both boys, I nursed. With both nursings, I used a nipple shield, which should be handed out in maternity wards like condoms in a middle school or glow sticks at a rave. I could write an entire post on how nipple shields are The Saving Grace. 

Six weeks into nursing Conner, I realized one major problem with using a device like the nipple shield: where the crap am I going to keep this thing?

I adopted the mantra of "closest is best..." and started keeping it in my nursing bra or tank top. I mean, that's where I keep my boobies, so... it seemed only natural. Since then, I've recommended this to COUNTLESS people who start to shake when I begin digging into my cleavage to show them... oh how I laugh on the inside when people become momentarily uncomfortable (I'm not just going to yank out a tit here, SWEAR!)

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Then, sometime over the last 2 weeks I began merging the two ideas: need a place to keep iphone as my warranty is up and they've already replaced my phone THREE times... AND... I always keep my boobies with me... SO....

Michael and I were sitting at breakfast the other morning. He did a double take after glancing at me to finish a sentence. He barked out a laugh that would have contained milk and Frosted Flakes if better timed.

Yup. 

iPhone Boobie.

It's all the rage.

200th post was yesterday! 

I Heart You Apple.

While in Birmingham on Friday, I made an appointment with a local Genius (how genius is it to call them geniuses?) at the Apple Store at the Summit. My iphone has been asking me for several months now "Would you like to turn on the Airplane mode?" ... and I'm obviously not living on an airplane so I was sick of answering no.

As a back story, this is my 3rd iphone - the first died last May at the beach. It wouldn't charge, it wouldn't turn on and after calling Apple, they determined that making me drive from Montgomery to Birmingham was a smidge ridiculous and they shipped me a box so that I could ship my phone to them and determine the problem. I shipped on a Wednesday morning at NO COST TO ME WHATSOEVER and by Friday afternoon they had replaced my phone with a brand new one and it was in my hands. Same story, different problem about 6 months back - the phone had "numb" area... just this band across the length of the screen where touching it did nothing. Shipped on a Tuesday afternoon, Friday morning - Brand. New. Phone.

So, I wasn't expecting my Valentine's gift from the Apple Gods, but after waiting 15 minutes in Apple Paradise (*swoon*), the geek Genius tells me that although my warranty expired (2 weeks ago, actually), they'd wave the $200 replacement fee and GIVE ME A NEW PHONE.

*double swoon*

I heart you Apple. You make my insides go pitter-patter.