If You Have Learned NOTHING Else From Me: Coffee

Coffee. It’s… it’s basically a flavored drug if we are going to be both frank and slightly scientific. But if you want it to be both of those things AND have it taste of your childhood Christmas mornings, try this:

Say the following at the magic speaker located on top of what appears to be a logo containing a Mermaid:

Ah, yes

I would like a Grande Hot Chocolate with a squeeze of caramel and 2 shots of expresso, please.

Then enjoy BUT leave just enough at the bottom for this:

Setting: Midafternoon

You are feeling sleepy, very sleepy. Your eyes are getting drooooopy.

1 cup + ice cubes + that room temp Starbucks =